By Nancy Virden (c)2026 AlwaysTheFight.com

There’s a little ditty I learned as a child:

Make new friends but keep the old;

One is silver and the other, gold.

I have old friends- some from childhood over sixty years ago, and others from early adulthood thirty or forty years ago. We still care about each other, keep in touch, and rarely see each other due to distance and health. We can be there for each other thanks to technology. We are from the generation when letter-writing was not rare, so we have that to fall back on, too.

I have new friends- made this summer at my new church. We are learning about each other, establishing trust, and having some fun along the way. Three ladies are already special to me because we meet for Bible Study once per week. Sharing over the Bible and prayers draws people closer, faster.

My first visit to this church was in early June. Already, I am in charge of organizing the women’s conference in September. That’s how fast trust can grow in certain situations. Three keys to that kind of growth are honesty, authenticity, and kindness. I also do not wait for people to make me feel welcome. Introducing myself to as many as I can makes me approachable.

We need social support. Emotional support in tough times, tangible support when we meet our limits, informational support when we’re clueless, and fulfillment of certain needs such as belonging and connectedness. It takes some effort to maintain old and new friendships, but it is as necessary as breathing.

How to gain and maintain social support

1. Attend to your existing relationships by reaching out. For years, I used to surprise an old friend at her job as a vet technician even though we live in separate cities. I call my aunt two to three times a year, between texts. It is not hard, but effort is necessary.
2. Increase community involvement. I am meeting more people by organizing the conference than I would otherwise. Participate in hobby groups, volunteering, or church groups. This is a great way to meet like-minded people.
3. Attend support groups. The group I run for family members of unhoused adults who live with a mental illness is a resounding success. The people who attend have formed friendships that go beyond the main topic. It can be rewarding to share your story and provide support to others.
4. Use professional support when problems are more complicated or too difficult to handle alone.

None of us is on our own. We can grow in connectedness.

-COMMENTS WELCOME

Today’s Helpful Word

Hebrews 10:25

And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.

If you are feeling suicidal or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S., call 988, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. For a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room; in the EU, call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here.) Hope and help are yours!

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair. 

NOTE: Nancy is not a doctor or a mental health professional and speaks only from personal experience and observations. This website is not intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

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