By Nancy Virden (c)2024

Everyone carries traits of mental ill-health. Yes, even you. However, traits do not make for clinical diagnoses; traits are a part of being human.

For example, we can each admit to being selfish sometimes, and when we are unselfish it often follows an inward should I or shouldn’t I discussion. That is not narcissism; it is human. A diagnosis of narcissism goes far beyond selfishness. Narcissism is a one-hundred percent focus on having one’s way, feeling good, and expecting others to make you feel good. I hope that is not you.

Another example is self-pity. Everyone has slipped into self-pity even if momentarily. Self-pity in and of itself is not a mental disorder. There are diagnoses where self-pity comes more into play and can ruin relationships. Human nature is full of such traits that do not become disorders.

A disorder is out of the norm, makes functioning and relationships difficult, goes beyond simple human nature, and often involves multiple causes such as traumatic experiences, physical illness, and genetics. A list of causes is ever-evolving as the study of human behavior progresses. In the matter of serious mental illness, recovery will require medical intervention. In the case of personality disorder, re-training may take the rest of your life. This post is focused on those with mere human traits.

If your struggle is against typical human traits, Jesus offers some answers through Paul’s writing. Romans 12:2 tells us to avoid becoming like or copying how current society tells us to think. Instead, we are to change our minds by beginning over, losing old ways of reasoning, and renewing our thought processes. If society says to think of yourself, then think of others. If today’s crowd promotes freedom without consequences, then count the cost.

Renewal comes from the Holy Spirit, who will come to us who yield to Christ Jesus. Jesus saves us not only for eternity but also now. As we follow his example, read His Word (The Holy Bible), pray in his name, and grow our faith, we will experience the renewal of our thinking and behaviors. Period.

To keep this in perspective, and this is only one person’s example (each of us is different), I began following Jesus at age 15. For fifteen more years, I was still disrespectful to my mother. I repented and stopped that behavior when God showed me how much it hurt her. My thinking toward her changed. However, my tendency to judge others with a sense of criticism did not die at that time. At 63, I still arrest my critical thoughts and replace them with blessings over people. All the while, bipolar disorder has challenged improvement. It takes work to renew one’s mind.

Perfection will not be ours on this side of heaven. Trauma, abuse, false messages, none of it can be blamed when we do not try to renew our minds. We are responsible for finding a way to wash the world’s bitterness and resentment out of our thinking.

Untreated mental illnesses and disorders get worse over time. They tend to occur more frequently and grow in intensity. So too with unrepentant traits. Embedded negative traits will get worse by becoming more stubborn. We will buy into our rationalizations. The selfishness, self-pity, manipulating, controlling, biting, judging, lying, thieving, slandering, anger, and blame we nursed and excused throughout our lives will be hallmarks of our personality and become our legacy.

-COMMENTS WELCOME

Today’s Helpful Word

2 Corinthians 5:16-18a

So we have stopped evaluating others from a human point of view. At one time we thought of Christ merely from a human point of view. How differently we know him now!  This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!

 And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ.

If you are feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call 988, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. For a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room. In the EU call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here ). Hope and help are yours!

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair. 

NOTE: Nancy is not a doctor or a mental health professional, and speaks only from personal experience and observations. This website is not intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

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