By Nancy Virden (c)2024

1. Self-awareness means our minds and motives are subject to interrogation by honesty. Admitting our role in our suffering is not fun. It can hurt, yet we give room to bitterness if we refuse to do so. It is most likely true that something terrible has happened and we have no participation in it. However, is it also true that we have fed our victimhood and made ourselves more miserable? I have heard it said that suffering is inevitable, misery is an option. If we do not choose misery, we will think long and hard about how to escape it. Perhaps that means changing how we view ourselves.

2. Loving our enemies is no easy or simple task. We rebel against the idea and hide in our anger. This can lead to self-righteousness because we know our enemy does not deserve our love, kindness, or forgiveness. It is true, they do not. The opposite is also true; we have not earned love or kindness either. That which others, even family and God offer is a gift. Think about it, if we can earn love, is it love? No one can earn love, not you, your loved ones, the best people you know, or your enemy. Realizing this makes it simpler (though not easier) to offer love as a gift of self. Loving our enemies does not mean trusting someone who hurts us. It does mean that we bless them in prayer, perhaps with a good deed if appropriate, and set aside our resentment.

3. Humility is not humiliation. Down-to-earth people can recognize their privileges are gifted by God. Some call it luck, but a proud “I did it my way” allows one to look down on those who assumably did not. This kind of pride is detrimental because one could lose it all at any time. Self-awareness teaches us that we are not better or above anyone else. We know our thoughts and understand that God’s grace has kept us from falling beyond help. We can see others through the eyes of Jesus and begin to sincerely care about our neighbors. While struggling, we do not have to ask “Why me?” as if we deserve to avoid suffering. Instead, we can pursue, “What do I need to learn?” or “How can I put this to good use to benefit others?”

4. Job said, “Blessed be the name of the Lord” while he suffered the loss of his children and workers, livelihood, reputation, and health. Praising God is one way to express humility and gratitude. Gratitude can take the edge off raw nerves and help to center us on what is real besides pain. For example, at the scene of a car accident, we can be grateful for helpers and say so. At the death of a loved one, expressing gratitude for the gift of having known them is bittersweet yet positive. Appreciating condolences and even awkward efforts to cheer you will not erase grief. However, knowing others miss the one we lost proves we are not alone. Thanking God for our troubles is an act of deep faith in the One who sees all, even the future.

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Today’s Helpful Word

Job 1:20-22 nkj

Then Job arose, tore his robe, and shaved his head; and he fell to the ground and worshiped. And he said: “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, And naked shall I return there.
The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.” In all this Job did not sin nor charge God with wrong.

If you are feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call 988, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. For a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room. In the EU call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here ). Hope and help are yours!

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair. 

NOTE: Nancy is not a doctor or a mental health professional, and speaks only from personal experience and observations. This website is not intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

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