By Nancy Virden (c)2020
A few weeks ago, I confessed to you my need to re-enter recovery. I owed you that. To dare represent the values of my faith and my hope for you in this blog, I must be honest about what I am going through. Besides, we all know that secrets can kill.
I had already confessed to my doctor and 12-step group. With their encouragement, I felt hope and made important decisions that stuck. As a result, the eating disorder is under control. Addict thought processing is not. Let me explain.
Have you ever heard the term, “dry drunk”? It refers to a person who has quit drinking yet has no mindset change. People with any addiction or compulsive behavior may experience the same phenomenon. The addict mindset still tells me I can eat when I want and remain in control. So, I am not eating. Obviously unhealthy, this could lead to another kind of eating disorder.
Two weeks ago, I signed up for a health coach. We spoke for the first time today. She is helping me with reality and putting back in place those behaviors that worked for me before. Her support is already helping and will prove invaluable.
To be free of both the eating disorder and the addiction, I must be honest with myself first, with my Highest Power (Jesus), and with other human beings.
You see, honest is the only type of person who experiences freedom from addiction.
Great news though! Even becoming willing to be honest is not a job I had to carry alone. As a praying person, I am used to going to Jesus and asking for insight. I know his ‘voice’. He always guides me in the right direction.
Eight weeks ago I did not want to change. An internal push to admit my behaviors to my doctor, then to my group, came from God. I find it no coincidence that I noticed an announcement from my medical insurance provider that a health coach could be free.
Friends and family might be your encouragers. Make certain the people you choose are people who will successfully hold you accountable. Otherwise, it’s only a game. Once you have your safe, strong, support system, you do not have to accomplish anything else on your own unless you hide.
I’m done hiding. By stretching my trust muscles I am finding hope and success. Here’s to me- and you- in search of recovery. We will find it and keep it as long as we never forget who we need and nurture that support.
Today’s Helpful Word
Psalm 32:1-2
Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight! Yes, what joy for those whose record the Lord has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty!
Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair.
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NOTE: I am not a doctor or a mental health professional, and speak only from personal experiences and observations. In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.
If you are feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or for a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.
If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room. In the EU call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here ). Hope and help are yours!
*Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright (c) 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.., Carlo Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved
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