By Nancy Virden (c)2026, AlwaysTheFight.com

I wrote a post in 2018 called I Gave Up, and It Saved My Life, intending to share how giving up false hope changed everything for the better. My mindset flipped, my worldview improved, and my sense of self as God sees me began to take shape. Before 2011, my hope had rested in my husband.

Some hopes are futile. At best, they offer temporary help. Placing hope in the “universe,” a vague and immeasurable source of gas and flame, dead planets and asteroids, and random explosions, is useless. The universe has no power or authority to guide anyone, let alone control our destinies.

Placing hope in a person or in the “human spirit” is to deny history and human nature. No society or individual is without innate chaos. We are each in need of order, learning to obey laws and the simple rules of courtesy.

Placing hope in a make-believe higher power is short-sighted. I heard a woman say in AA that a higher power could be a grain of sand. That is a twist of reason, as she assigns herself the highest authority and the right to create a higher power.

Placing hope in a support system may fail because it is a group of fallible human beings. No one can be everywhere at all times, read our minds, or know exactly what we need. They cannot accompany us to the store or sit by us and talk about pleasantries as we stare at the dark night. No human rescue is possible because everyone has their own needs to meet.

Placing our hope in loving relationships is temporary. Humans get sick, selfish, demanding, impatient, move away, end the relationship, or die.

Placing hope in the bottle, the fix, a second helping, or staring at screens is to lean into the very things that steal hope. We lose our health and very selves as escapism and avoidance keep us locked in a permanent hold.

You may be able to add to this list. Perhaps your hope is pointing in a nonsustainable direction. Hope that is deferred is soon lost. When will you give up?

Turning on the car radio after leaving the divorce lawyer’s office following my first appointment in 2015, a song began. The Christian band, Casting Crowns, sang, “Your world’s not falling apart, it’s falling into place… Just be held.” What perfect timing, and I received what seemed to be a message from my Heavenly Father.

He is where I place my hope now. If I’m scared or anxious, his presence comforts me. Worship gives me strength. When I’m depressed, he sits with me. He does not condemn me for strong emotions.

Hope in Christ does not fail because the promise of eternal life in heaven is enough to face whatever this life puts in our path.

If it seems your world is falling apart, the best possible mental health and recovery falls into place when you place your hope in the One who is actually the Highest Power.

-COMMENTS WELCOME

Today’s Helpful Word

Romans 5:3-5

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

If you are feeling suicidal or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S., call 988, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. For a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room; in the EU, call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here.) Hope and help are yours!

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair. 

NOTE: Nancy is not a doctor or a mental health professional and speaks only from personal experience and observations. This website is not intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

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