By Nancy Virden (c)2025

It just happens. You are not expecting it, although you’ve learned to be a bit wary. Going throughout your day with plain and simple thoughts, suddenly, a memory. An unwanted scene begins to play out in your mind and you are thrust back into that moment, those days or years, of trauma.

This is called a flashback, and they are painful. The best way to deal with it, in my experiential view, is to run, not walk, to what you know is true. I am not a victim today. I am in control of my situation. This is October 20, 2025. God loves me. My friends love me. Quote the Bible, your therapist, or your favorite inspirations. Be present. Stay in today.

Not all triggers are flashbacks. Some leave you with a gnawing ache and deep disappointment. Today was going so well. Why do I have to battle this now? It brings down your mood and your smiles are a little less energized. You may feel anxiety rise.

These silent triggers are no fun, and not particularly easy to pass through. Take some time, even if only running to the bathroom, to get away and reframe your perspective. It happened, now what? Do I choose to allow this to take me from what I was doing? Sometimes, it is appropriate to back off. However, set a time limit to your withdrawal such as one hour or one day. Triggers do not need to own us.

Triggers that change your behavior, such as showing anger at a slight, fear at signs of someone trying to control you, jerking back at a touch, responding sharply to perceived threat, and more, can be challenged and corrected. It takes hard work.

Firstly, we must see it in ourselves. If people react negatively to our behavior, it is worth doing a self-check. Why did I act that way? If it seems to be outside your regular nature, look for the fear that might be behind it.

Secondly, each time it occurs, decide what kind of person you want to be. Do you want to be valued for a victim status, your mood, or for coming across as touchy? Or do you want people to see you walking in the strength and soundness of reason?

Thirdly, discover what step you can take that will lead you to becoming the person you want. For me, it takes pausing, reflecting, and speaking. I pause when I am triggered. I reflect on the cause of my emotions. I ask, “Do the people around me deserve to be corrected or made my scapegoats?” Probably not. If I need to speak up, I try to do so in the moment and not allow it to simmer. Often, it is best if I can walk away for brief time and get my thoughts together.

I hope this help you next time you feel triggered. Check out my upcoming post on Grounding, as it seems to be a miracle-worker in high pressure situations.

-COMMENTS WELCOME

Today’s Helpful Word

Psalm 119:132-134 niv

Turn to me and have mercy on me,
    as you always do to those who love your name.
Direct my footsteps according to your word;
    let no sin rule over me.
Redeem me from human oppression,
    that I may obey your precepts.

If you are feeling suicidal or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S., call 988, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. For a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room; in the EU, call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here.) Hope and help are yours!

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair. 

NOTE: Nancy is not a doctor or a mental health professional and speaks only from personal experience and observations. This website is not intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

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