By Nancy Virden (c)2021

Leaders, devotion to the mission means taking care of yourself. That means drawing (and sticking to) healthy boundaries.

One of the fastest ways to unravel a good intention is to jump from compromise to compromise until the original plan is unrecognizable. A leader must be careful that the leadership role does not shift out of proportion.

For example, I am taking training to become a Certified Peer Supporter. My job will be to help people who are struggling with their mental health. Peer Supporters are taught to never lend money, accept gifts, give peer-clients rides, ask them for favors, etcetera. Why? Because if the role changes from Peer Supporter to rescuer or enabler, the peer-client suffers. The mission dies.

If as a leader you find yourself lost in a self-woven web of compromise, take a step back and reconsider. Think about your priorities and goals for yourself, family, followers, and mission. Write them out. Choose which ones to always say yes to. Think about this: Each time you say yes to something that is not on your yes list, you are exchanging the most important for the lesser.

Let us say you want to hold a meeting. One person cannot make it at the time you set, so you unthinkingly reset to a time that clashes with your child’s ballgame. Another person says they do not have a ride on that newly set date, so you promise to pick them up. They show up with kids and insist you drop them off at daycare. Meanwhile, you do not have time to pick up the tray of food you ordered for the meeting and you arrive late. A third person says they do not like taking notes, so you scribble the group comments for them. Distracted, you lose track of your agenda and fall short of the meeting’s goals. You had said you would volunteer at your church that night, however, your time is spent typing up the meeting notes.

That is one of the fastest ways to unravel a leader.

Know what to say yes to and you will be aware of what to say no to. -COMMENTS WELCOME

Today’s Helpful Word

Proverbs 14:8

The prudent understand where they are going,  but fools deceive themselves.

Always the Fight Ministries (ATFM) has been displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse since 2012. Nancy is the founder and voice of ATFM and openly shares her emotional resurrection from despair.

NOTE: I am not a doctor or a mental health professional, and speak only from personal experiences and observations. In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

If you are feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or for a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room. In the EU call 112. (For other international emergency numbers, go here ). Hope and help are yours!

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