Always the Fight Ministries: Displaying compassion for those fighting mental illness, addiction, or abuse. (c)2019 Nancy Virden

As we have seen in the past year or so, some very rich and famous women are speaking up and sharing their stories of sexual abuse and assault by rich and famous men. Far less common are news stories that reveal these crimes in neighborhoods, schools, churches, businesses, and families. 

I received a community letter today with the picture of a man on the front. It read, “This man is a registered sex offender… we are informing you that he has moved into your area…”  The letter included his address and crime.

Suggestions on how to protect yourself and loved ones from sex offenders are part of this letter’s important information. When about one-fifth of women in the US are assaulted at some point in their lives, along with about one in every 71 men, we need to know!

The following excerpt found on DifferenceBetween.com explains some legal terminology*. 

What is the difference between Sex Offender and Sex Predator?

• Sexual predator is an offender of a more serious nature than sex offender.
• A person is labeled a sexual predator when he is so referred by a court of law.
• An individual may be a sex offender but becomes a sex predator if he commits the same offence another time.
• Thus, a sex offender can be upgraded to be a sex predator.
• A sex predator is either a child molester or a rapist.
• Authorities are required to notify public about sex predators living in their midst.
• Sex predator is a term inspired by the manner in which an animal hunts its prey.

Psychologist Leonie Adamson specializes in helping clients who have been sexually abused.

In her observation, sex offenders do not stand out as excessively abnormal. Those who are aware of the crimes may remain silent to avoid repercussions. 

Dr. Adamson goes on to say, “In many cases, victims weren’t believed, and this has caused them further distress. In some cases, they have come from abusive families themselves and their sense of self-worth is so low, that they feel they deserve to be treated badly.”

“However, because the sexual predator flourishes in silence and covert behavior, the mask must be uncovered to help free victims from this abuse. Their voices must be heard and respected. Always.” **

Dr. Adamson’s 8 signs of a sexual predator.

1. HE’S REALLY ATTENTIVE IN THE EARLY STAGES
2. HE USES MANIPULATIVE LANGUAGE
3. HE MAKES IT SEEM NORMAL
4. HE PLAYS THE VICTIM
5. HE RIDICULES HER
6. HE PUSHES HER BOUNDARIES SEXUALLY
7. HE DISEMPOWERS HER
8. HE SECRETLY BOASTS ABOUT HIS CONQUESTS

He will be a different person to the outside world, which just negates anything she says about him – his mask never slips.

As believers meet in churches across the world, we want to believe the best of others in the faith. We tend to easily accept what we see over what a child, wife, or others are trying to say. If a man (or woman) is charming enough, makes us laugh, says all the right religious things, we may stand by their side in blindness. 

Victims must be heard.

Today’s Helpful Word
Psalm 90:8 NLT
You spread out our sins before you—
our secret sins—and you see them all.

Beware of Wolves in Sheep Clothing:  part one   part two

NOTE: I am not a doctor or mental health professional, and speak only from personal experiences and observations. In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.
If you are feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or for a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.
If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S. or go to your nearest emergency room. (for international emergency numbers, go here ). Hope and help are yours!

*What is the difference between Sex Offender and Sex Predator? Retrieved from https://www.differencebetween.com/difference-between-sex-offender-and-vs-predator/ on November 7, 2019

**How to spot a sexual predator: Psychologist breaks down 8 classic warning signs – and how to protect yourself. Daily Mail. Retrieved from https://www.dailymail.co.uk/ health/article-4974262/How-spot-sexual-predator- according-psychologist.html on November 7, 2019